Intimacy, the dance…

Many fear intimacy. The answer is simple. If we don’t love ourselves completely, it is very difficult to love another. When I met my husband so long ago I was terrified. He was loving and kind. His love was so intense I thought there must be something wrong with him. Clearly, my tolerance for love was very low. I was the kind of person who wanted those I couldn’t have and when I had them, I didn’t want them. I decided to go for it and grow in my self love. When there are conflicts, talk about it (when calm). When there is discussion, use “I” statements (“I feel….”) instead of blame. It can be much easier to walk away, blame or talk to others. It feeds our need for being a victim.. It feeds our negative belief (whatever that is). Instead look at each conflict as an opportunity to grow more in love with yourself. Love and have compassion for the part in them that bothers you. You may discover that you share in that in some way and you have finally given yourself the love and compassion you deserve.

About the author

Kim Hiles (Dancing Feather) was born in Pennsylvania in the 1960s. Her mother was from Germany and met her father while stationed there. The family moved several times before settling in a town called Millis, Massachusetts.

Kim developed severe anxiety and depression as a child and struggled to find her way. Growing up, Kim was told by her grandmother that she wrote beautiful letters and had a way with words. Later in life, this memory would be a catalyst for sitting down and writing her memoir.

Continuing to say yes to life, Kim talks about her struggles of addiction, anxiety, depression and relationship issues, to name a few. She considers it her life mission to help empower others and uses her memoir as a way to offer guidance in living a more authentic life, following your dreams.

She has overcome much adversity and enjoys walking with others as they find their way. Kim has also co-written a young adult fantasy with her husband Will, called Little Wonders. Their pen name is K.W. Hiles.

Kim is a successful Educator, Social and Emotional Learning Specialist, Behavior Specialist, Mediator (Restorative Practices), 3rd degree Reiki Practitioner, and blogs regularly. In addition Kim offers online classes at Shamanic Passages Institute

Kim is considered highly sensitive and intuitive. Utilizing her gifts, her mission is to channel inspiration and healing and help spread some light. Empowering others to create the life of their dreams is the ultimate goal.

Kim is happily married (21+ years) and lives with her husband, son and their animal companions.

"I had a teacher who told us to go out that week and see how many Mercedes cars we noticed. When I came back I told her I had seen a lot! She asked me if I had seen any junk cars. I told her I didn’t remember seeing any. The next week she reversed it and asked us to go out and see how many junk cars we noticed. Of course we noticed a lot but didn’t remember seeing any Mercedes cars. Where is your focus? Is it on the problem or on the solution and more importantly, where would you like it to be?" -- Kim Hiles

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